Am I Lost?

Myriad thoughts,
Eternal Abyss,  
Why am I confused?    
Ain’t my journey towards bliss?

I found it,
And I chose it,
But why am I finding,
the efforts, not worth it?

Am I lost?
Should I retreat?
Can I bear  
the sting of defeat?

Advices soared,
Made me sour,
Did I ask from myself,
way too more?

Heart pitied,
At my mind’s puzzle,
Soothing it,
To clear the muddle,

Remember the days,
Had found too many ways,
Chose to tread on this,
matter not what it pays.

Keep walking,
stop sulking,
throw out,
the needless inkling,

You were great,
You will be the best,
Continue your voyage,
And, you will reach the crest.
9 Responses
  1. Sujith,
    A fair attempt I must say. However, what I did was just a mere first round of editing. It needs much more. If you look at the stanzas they are disjointed. Also, the lines within a stanza are disjointed as well.

    I appreciate your gesture of acknowledging my help, but I feel I haven't done enough to receive such generosity from you.

  2. Sujith Says:

    Thanks Vittal,

    As This is my first ever attempt in this genre, its very very raw. And as you said, the lines might be disjointed. But I wanted to keep it like that, so that my attempt is evident. Am still not able to find out my mistakes, so just waiting to grow so that I can see it very easily...

    probably I should not have used your name for this not-so-good attempt, but you gave some really good suggestions which made this attempt atleast postable.... So I just wanted to acknowledge for it.. If not for the suggestion, it would have been still more worse.

    Thanks again

  3. Sujith,
    You are a good sport and I appreciate it. If I can help you, I will do it for sure and I am happy that you value my suggestion so much. Go ahead and write your heart out like you have always done.

    Don't forget to visit my blogspace as well. You missed one post and I have a new one up today. I would like to hear from you. :-)

  4. Karthik Says:

    Loved the message, Sujith. Keep writing. :-)

  5. Sujith Says:

    Hey thanks karthik.... I was too skeptical to even post this.

    Just trying out something after getting inspired from the league of extra-ordinary gentlemen like you....

    The blog-a-ton post of yours was awesome...

  6. rAHUL Says:

    good attempt dude... keep writing... thats all i can say...

  7. Hey buddy,
    Too busy, huh? You missed a couple of posts on my blog. Do spare some time, read them, and let me know how you liked them. :-)

  8. GST Refunds Says:

    I am extremely impressed along with your writing abilities, Thanks for this great share.